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I know that you all begin your Thursdays with a sense of anticipation for me to announce my weight for the week. No? Maybe that's just me then. Anyway (drum roll, please) I am down another 3.4 lbs. to 255.8. I am pleased to be down so much this week, but I am also really excited that I almost weigh less than my fella! Matthew is a big guy - 6'3" and 250 lbs. and I hate that I have out-weighed him for a while now. In another two weeks or so, I should weigh less than him.
I had this strange thought this morning when I was walking. When I picture myself, I don't really see myself as all that fat. I know that is kind of hard to imagine. Like yesterday I was wearing my new outfit (Thanks, Kristen!) and imagining that I looked really nice. The clothes fit nicely and weren't too tight or anything. But then I saw the photo that I posted with yesterday's blog and thought how fat that I still look. Which I guess is about right since I've only lost just over 24 lbs. and I needed to lose at least 100 lbs. But I am still constantly catching my reflection in store mirrors and being surprised by how big I am. It makes me wonder how I ever became so disconnected from reality.
15 comments:
I feel the same way. In my head I am not that big, but when I see a pic or the mirror I am appalled at how big I let myself get.
Congrats on the loss!
I pulled this one off the internet when I did a search of medical sites at the beginning of my journey way back in Nov. '08 and I use the term a lot in my blog (it's tagged too)...it's called Body Dysmorphic Disorder (BDD) and I have it too...or sorry, I may have given my bug to you!! Funny thing is, you'll have the same problem when you get smaller, only the opposite way...I still can't see myself as that much thinner than I am in my head...it's like my head got stuck in the middle of all that yo yoing! Keep taking pics and looking at the old ones, it helps! OH, I forgot why I was here! CONGRATS on the great WL week!
I thought you looked great in that photo! Maybe its "only" 24 lbs. but the outfit was more form fitting and it made you look much thinner than the photo of you wearing the green t-shirt. Its a perfect example of what Amy was saying last week...if you wear big clothes to cover yourself, they make you look bigger. Wear something that fits your curves and you'll actually look smaller!
Nice weekly weight loss! Starting next week, I can have Thursday as my weigh-in day also. Maybe not next week though as it will only be the day after surgery but after that, I think I'll go with thursday!
Ohhh.... I think there are alot of us that can relate!
I was so horrified by my highschool reunion photo. It's was the catalyst for finally doing something about my weight. Before that I just kept telling myself "at least I'm healthy" - rubbish!!
You are doing amazing and soon you will be surprised when you see your picture for a whole other reason :-)
I totally know the feeling about being disconnected, how do we get that way? UGH
And i have always been bigger than my husband so this will be an awesome milestone for me to hit also, congratulations on that :)
YEAY!!! You're almost to the smaller than husband phase!!! :o)
I picked the photo of me in the green tee-shirt and black pants because you can REALLY see how fat I am. That was taken in December and I was shocked when I saw it. When I was thin, I always thought I was fat. Even when I weighed 118 lbs. and was under-weight, I thought I was fat. I bet I do have BDD.
Amanda, I'm so glad you got the clothes and they're working for you! Thanks for posting a photo. Enjoy them, and congrats on a great loss this week!
Congrats!!
I do the same thing. I don't see myself as fat when I look in the mirror but think my pics make me look fat. What's up with that.
I think any girl that was/is big.. just doesnt see themselves that way .. or at least that big. I know I was like that too.. now I have trouble with being small lol. We can't win can we? And I went back to your last post to check out your pic? You don't look that bad, trust me. And the best part - you will keep getting smaller. Believe in yourself.
Great weekly loss.....
I can SO relate to this. I know that I've been guilty of seeing someone and being thankful that I'm "not that big". What the hell am I thinking. I am 255 lbs. I'm FAT, yet I try and kid myself. THEN, I see the pictures and I am mortified. It is a total disconnect. On a happier note, I am thrilled for your loss!! :)
awesome loss! i do the walking by mirrors and windows thing too...i have absolutely no idea just how big i am!
Fantastic loss! I too was so pleased when I dipped below my partner's weight, specially as he's way taller than I am...
Caroline
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