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A while ago I discovered that I'd exceeded the number of blogs that I could follow, at least according to Blogger. If you're curious, they allow you to follow 300 blogs. It is kind of irritating to see that I have a new follower and go to their page and discover that I couldn't follow them back. So before I forget, if you are following me and I am not following you, please leave your blog address in my comments.
So I started the process of reviewing all of the blogs that I am following. I'm only on the D's. Sigh. I noticed some stupid things about Blogger. #1 - If a blog no longer exists, I cannot "de-follow" it. Stupid. #2 - If a blog has been made private, I have to send an email or some other BS and ask to be allowed to stop following the blog. Also stupid. Or maybe I'm the stupid one. It is possible that I am doing it wrong, especially when you consider that it took me a really long time to figure out why I couldn't add more blogs to my reading list and an even longer time to learn how to stop following blogs. If you have any tips, I'd appreciate them.
What I really wanted to post about, however, is how it feels to stop following a blog. Sometimes I chose to stop following because they haven't posted in six months or two years. In those cases, their last post was usually something like, "I can't believe how long it has been since I posted! I am a bad blogger!" (Ya think?) Sometimes the last post was more like, "I am really struggling and need help." (How did that end?) A couple last posts were, "I had a horrible stuck episode" which left me wondering if they never recovered. (Can that happen?). I know blogging isn't for everyone, but as I glanced at the blogs and the last posts of people who had stopped blogging for whatever reason, I felt sad and wished I knew that things were going well for them.
Then there were blogs that I really wanted to stop following. People whose blogs I never read because something about them irritated me or we just didn't jive for whatever reason. A few of the blogs I was following were people who had not had WLS. They were trying to lose weight through WW or some other method. When I've read their blog posts, they usually sound like things I could have written a few years ago. ("Everything is great. I'm following the diet 100%. I rock!" Followed by, "I slipped up. I'm going to start again." And then, "I suck. I hate myself.") It isn't that I can't relate or don't empathize with their situation that caused me to de-follow them. It is more that I spent too much of my life on THAT particular treadmill and I just don't have the energy to do it again.
There were also a couple of blogs (okay maybe just one) that I wanted to un-follow, but I didn't. At some point the blogger said something that hurt my feelings. In general I like her blog and can relate to many of the things she talks about, but I can't get past the hurt. Dumb, right?
And remember, I'm just on the D's!
19 comments:
I feel ya. I don't like to unfollow either, but I have a tiny neat streak. Unfortunately this neat streak doesn't seem to apply to the flooring in my house or to my bathroom....I don't have any technical advice for you either, sorry I'm clueless there. But I feel ya. And I also want to say thanks for all of your heartfelt support for the last year +. It's meant a lot to me Amanda. :)
Hi Amanda, I love your blog and have just started my own. I am hoping to get banded in the next couple of months.
http://cantwaittobeme.blogspot.com/
I did just the same thing last week, took me forever and unfortunately I did it in about 40 thousand steps and then re-did some so my technical advice would be crap!
I like all the reason you would de-follow someone but one I like the most is the one where they are always negative, can't do it and I too de-followed a few last week because of this! Oh well, makes room for the more normal one! Are we normal? lol
Glad I'm in the L's - I'd hate to be the one who inadvertently hurt your feelings... Be assured that if I learned I had, I'd grovel with apology...
Caroline
It's more than fair enough. Who could realistically read 300 blogs if they were up to date ones, which you found interesting and suited you? Just like we can't be friends with everyone, we can't follow everyone either.
As for de-following advice, one way is to go to the page and click follow. It pop's up to say "You're already following this blog ... do you want to stop"
The other way is to go to the manage button at the bottom of the reading list on the dashboard. Click it.It brings up a list of blogs you follow. Click settings next to a blog (you may need to sign in again here) It pops up a little window to change settings. On the left it says basic. You can click stop following this blog on the basic page, or go to Sites I've joined (3rd option under basics) and press stop following. It asks you to confirm and it's done. I suspect this will help with the extinct blogs problem.
I am at http://fatontheinsideuk.blogspot.com/
if you want to follow me with some of your new space. :-D
Sheesh you are amazing. I have trouble staying up with the few I have and feel bad that I don't follow half the people who seem to have shown up on mine. Like Caroline I am glad I am in the L's :) I never want to hurt your feelings. A toast to Oregon banders :)
xxxooo
I am new to following you. While I haven't been around to read your whole journey, I did read your profile on Band Superstars and I have to say that I really like/appreciate your general approach/attitude toward life with the Band. I was banded in 3/2010 so I also like reading bloggers who have been banded around the same amount of time I have.
I understand about the unfollow predicament. I went through a mass "unfriend"-ing on FB a few months back and struggled with many of the same type thoughts.
I am glad I am not in the D's or above!!! Even still, I had this momonet where I was wondering if it was me that said something hurtful......
And you are right, blogger does have some strange things going on with it. I wish I could help you. If you do learn how to work around these things- let us all know!
You now have everyone that comes before E wondering if they're the one blog that you don't really like. I'm scared - I'm a C. LOL. The only time I unfollow people is if they never post. I feel bad unfollowing peole for other reasons.
I also hope that I'm not the one who inadvertently hurt your feelings. I would never intentionally do that to anyone in blogland in a million years. Everyone (to me so far) has been very supportive.
But I also wanted to write you to congratulate you for being featured on the Superstars page! YEA!!!
I'm also glad I'm not in the Ds or above (you are following me, right)...I'm sorry that someone hurt your feelings but I understand why you would unfollow that person. For me, reading blogs is all about getting support and inspiration (and, let's face it, entertainment) and anyone who isn't providing that for me will most likely be unfollowed.
Great post! I feel the same about the non-WLS blogs. Before I had VSG, I would read them to beat myself up and make myself feel like crap for thinking of taking the "easy way" out. (I am rather mean to myself at times, haha.)
The 'follow' settings are weird, and I have always been a little confounded by them. I haven't hit a limit yet.
Umm, if I ever hurt your feelings (whew, I'm in the "F"s!), I insist you call me on it. Your blog and your support have just been invaluable to me. Love it! I always say stupid things, but never say intentionally hurtful things to friends.
I like this post. It brings up a lot for debate. lol
I do understand and agree to almost all(hold off on deleting me...lol) but I think a lot of us have our not so proud moments and maybe blog when we shouldn't. But with that said, it is during those times that I got a lot of feelings out and can then move forward.
I don't like to continuously read negative crap but I do feel so much normal when someone else has meltdowns! lol
Great topic.
Well, I hope you are still following me (I AM in the D's...right there at the CUTOFF!! hehe) - but even if you aren't following me I will continue to BLOALK (block-stalk) you because I puffy heart you!!! LOL
And I SOOO need to do reading list maintenance... there are QUITE a few people I follow that have fallen off the face of the earth and some of them I often wonder about!! It's like there's a blog-bermuda-triangle!
OK, let me say I've never been so glad that I added that 'Lap' to my blog title...but being the worrier that I am, of course that was followed by 'but what if it was back when I was just Band Groupie'! (please let it not be me) I'll tell you I inadvertently made someone mad and was immediately blasted and it spun me on my heels. One thing I've learned from blogging so long is that when it's 'just words' things can be misinterpreted, and when it's 'just online' some people say things they would never say in person (bullies/mean girls). Someone recently told me, if someone hasn't said something hurtful to you online, if you don't have any haters, then you're probably not saying anything meaningful. So ((hugs)) for you.
Anywhoo...just taking a breather to catch up with you, and I can SO relate. I SO need to clean out my blogs...I've been putting it off because after 3+ years of blogging it's going to be depressing to see old friends disappear.
Love ya!
I was going to say the stuff that Sarah said. It's how I de-follow blogs, even extinct or private ones. I've even blocked a few in my time although they can still subscribe through Google Reader. I try to keep the blogs I follow to under 150. Mostly for the same reasons you mention which BTW had me LMAO with your questions. Too funny but I feel the same way. I get a little something out of each blog I follow. Now you have us all wondering who the mean girl was!
Well it's gonna take you forever to get to the S's!! I am a totally irregular blogger so I wouldn't feel bad at all if you decided not to follow me! I was surprised when I logged in to see how many still were following me given my recent hiatis!
As for the tech stuff....umm what Sarah said!!
Whew, I was worried you were talking about my blog having hurt your feelings. Thank goodness you were only in the D's!
I can definitely relate, sometimes I'm just over blogs. (Obviously. Have you seen the number of times women have called me out for unfollowing them? lol) It is always sad, because you think, "someone could/probably is having the same thoughts about doing the same to me"... but oh well!
Glad you did what you needed to do. :) And I feel you about "diet" blogs, because they (usually) always have a shitty comment or two about how they could never take the "easy way out." Ugh.
Sorry it's taken me a couple of days to comment, but I've been in Girl Scout Cookie hell and am SO behind. When it comes to following blogs, I do the same things. There are people I was following in the bginning who have dropped off the radar, some who I just CAN'T relate to no matter how hard I try and some whose personalities totally clash with mine. We can't all expect to get along with everyone or agree with everyone's beliefs, so don't feel guilty. I know I've lost followers over the last two years, but I can't expect everyone to like me. Don't feel bad about unfollowing. Go with your gut!
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